Thursday, September 20th

Thursday, September 20th: Todays miles = 20.3. Total PCT miles = 2194.5. Miles remaining = 469.

Washington is a lot more difficult than Oregon!! I feel like all I have been doing since I got into this state is going uphill.

I woke up this morning before the sun. I was so proud of myself for getting up earlier than usual. I checked my clock and it was 6:40am! I would have sworn it was 5am by the lack of sunlight. The days have begun to get shorter and there will be no escaping hiking in the dark every day now. It's almost completely dark by 7:30 at night and if the sun isn't rising until almost 7am I'll need new head lamp batteries pretty soon. I really do not like night hiking. Everything about it makes me want to stop, set up my tent, and go to sleep. Every noise of the woods seems 10 times louder in the dark. The wind blows and it's no longer refreshing but eerie. The head lamp light distorts your perception of where the trail is and I often trip. The more I hike at night, though, the more comfortable is becomes.

Today I crossed the 2,181 mile mark! This number may not seem important to most people but for me it is rather significant. The Appalachian Trail is 2,181 miles long, therefore, as of today I have hiked the same distance this year as last. The PCT is 482.5 miles longer than the AT so everyday now on the PCT makes for the longest distance I've ever hiked. There are 469 miles remaining on this hike for me. I have 20 more days to enjoy being out here on the trail. When you leave for the trail you don't really allow yourself to think of the end. It seems so far away and impossible to reach. You wake up, hike, eat, and sleep....day after day. You never really feel like your getting anywhere but on days like today when you realize that all you have left is 20 days you ask yourself 'where have all the miles gone?'. The trail is winding down to an end. I still have 469 miles but compared to what I have already done it feels like the last leg of the trail. Soon I will be standing at that monument in Canada wishing I could start at the beginning again. Don't get me wrong, it's going to be wonderful taking that first shower after the trail knowing I don't have to walk out into the woods again right away. Putting on baggy, cotton clothing (pajama pants and a hoodie) instead of tight spandex-ey material is going to be a feeling I have long missed. All the little things in our lives that we take for granted are going to seem so much sweeter to me; water out of a faucet, toilets, electricity, fresh foods, etc. Although, if I remember correctly, after the AT I tried to wear other clothes and found myself still walking around town in my hiking getup. I couldn't adjust to jeans right away. I couldn't sleep in a bed, use a blanket other than my sleeping bag, even sleep inside. I slept with my head lamp in arms reach in case I needed to get up in the night, forgetting I could turn on the lights. There were so many little things that made readjusting to the world so difficult. The moment you get off the trail there is a sinking feeling that erupts in your stomach; a pain in your whole body. You push yourself so hard to finish the trail, to make it to the end, and once you get there it's so hard to understand why you feel so sad. Your whole life aches for the trail. You submerge yourself back into your old world. There is no easing into it. One moment you are a traveling hiker living in the middle of nowhere with a backpack and then your thrown back into this crazy fast pace world. Everyone is asking you how your 'vacation' was. You try to explain what you have just gone through. You tell them stories and explain with as much detail as you can but there is no way possible to make anyone truly understand what it means to thru-hike. A thru hike is not a vacation, its just life on the trail. The things you experience while on a hike change you forever. The people you meet, the challenges you endure, the physical and occasion emotional pain you suffer while out here, the spectacular moments in nature; I have never had anything in my life compare to the endurance and difficulty of a thru hike. It's an addiction. I have a feeling that I will always be seeking out for my next fix.